insurance n Cussler

things seem to be starting to "flatten"... plateau... even feelings. yet i still get the bulk of anxiety at times.. man..this is all confusing. im getting impatient with my life. getting impatient with myself. damn.


today's insurance course left me thinking about how most ppl underestimate the importance of it... u know about the recent death of a 23yr old guy.. PT instructor in army.. died in a traffic accident... wat was even worse's that he din buy any insurance at all..so his family couldn get any claims .. can imagine the financial impact on the parents etc. im pretty sure he was hoped to be supporting the parents in time to come... im not sure if he's the only son.. sigh.

lucky for him, his army mates did a "fund-raising" n pooled money for those he left behind.
if he'd some or even 1 insurance policy, the money can at least tide the family tru with the funeral expenses n perhaps even much longer..

life's really unpredictable huh..u think u r young n full of dreams...everyone thinks u will make it big.. we think we are still healthy.. we think there's still a tomorrow..
n who's gonna guarantee that?

what happens if we suddenly die... who's gonna feed the parents..the wife..the children.. but if there's insurance protecting, then at least the money (which can be a damn lot) to claim can help the family.. it won't bring back the person to life..but at least it doesn't make matters worse with the burden.
amazing how it affects. a hell lot of difference.

yea i know it's hard to imagine bad stuff as such..esp. when we are young without having "mouths to feed" besides our own.. but we really gotta think. plan.

anyway...been really addicted to someone's stories lately. Clive Cussler. I bet u will love it..esp. guys I think.. he founded NUMA (National Underwater n Marine Agency) ..the chairman.. n he writes novels based on experiences n the NUMA files. they do lotta searching for lost ships of historic value..

his novels are damn addictive.. it's been a long time since im hooked on adventure stories.. though i must admit i get a little lost a lotta times with the technical terms of the ships, n the undersea.
if u are up for it, try his latest "Polar Shift" ..that's the first book I read.. it's fiction..but the story hints of how the Earth's gonna be really messed up when polar shift happens.. damn good.

it's really funny how this Cussler guy got me hooked on adventure novels.
let's see..since young... im really more into horror flicks..horror books.. while my peers in primary sch were reading Roald Dahl, Enid Blyton, Sweet Valley High (eek!)... I was into R.L Stine, Fear Street, Christopher Pike..
Sec. Sch n after... well..mostly textbooks.. haah. i know..im not really a "reading" person... yea. but of course..occasionally get some good biographies of pp.. maybe some Mitch Albom or equav. when I need a little push in life. but hardly dig those non-fiction motivational books. find them "too good to be true"..

then I got addicted to chic lit.. they make me lost in dreams.. makes life seem a little less serious...seem a little sweeter.. i like that.
n just 1 month ago. this Cussler guy got me. damn he's good. =)
http://www.numa.net/clive_cussler.html
he rocks.

tired.long day tomorrow. really want it to be over. can't wait.

with metta.

justice done..?

had a nice evening. was my night off today, so caught up with my parents over dinner @ Bugis =) went to check out Mustafa after that. I like that place, it always amazes me how they stock EVERYTHING in that tiny shopping centre.

Found out there are LOTS of instant stuff like dhal curry and those "Ready-to-eat" meals. damn impressed. esp. since there were LOTS of vegetarian options. =) bought a Pea n Mushroom curry thingy.. gonna try it. im not really a Pea person..but the picture looks nice le. hee.

din buy much actually, just some nice time "hanging out". talked bout the insurance thingy with them.. guess am just gonna go for the course..try it out n see how it goes. So.. anyone who's interested or should wanna buy insurance in future...u know who to look for! =) Im gonna be THE ONE.dun worry... I will make sure u make the right choice! *hiakz*

oh yea yea.. guess what! received a letter form the police today.. remember the SOB who "flashed"... or rather chose to let his stuff "displayed" in public n freak the hell out of ppl.. ?

yea yea. he was convicted in court. fined a few thousand n 2 weeks jail. im not trying to be a saddist. but i think he got what he deserved. i can't imagine if he was let off free...what if he let his "hormones" take over n attempt more horrible stuff to others the next time? omg..*shudder*

then again. honestly.. i really wonder if this punishment will change much.. what happens after the 2 weeks. tell me. if he does not get proper psychological therapy or help, it's gonna happen again, aint it?

Although Im totally disgusted @ the things these pp do..preying on the innocent.. I know they are unwell ..in need of help. I really hope they can get the help they need.. n if they do "mend their ways".. that would be wonderful. otherwise.. sigh.

oh well...but hey i had a nice evening today.. am just gonna smile n look forward to a nice weekend.. of work. =)

with metta...

passed...why!

guess wat. passed the insurance exam. sigh. first time in my life feeling lost after passing an exam. ya i studied but honestly everything didn make sense to me at all..just merely memorising n forcing the info into my brains.
dunno why the heck i could pass too. i guess prob good karma happened to ripen at that time..lucky or not i really dunno.

am so lost..because i pass , i ve to go tru the training and all.. my parents seemed to be keen on me being an insurance adviser.. it's not the first time i let known my "non-interest".. am i supposed to go on with it even though the stuff makes me stressed up n sad? well..maybe like what my mum would say.. a job is a job.. not everyone will like their job.. it's about earning a living. (i reallly don't wish to be one of these ppl..)
im hoping a "decent" job will come along soon.. or more like smtg to happen so i can get out of this "career job" crisis.. it's making me sad. urgh.

hmm..other than tat.. my days were pretty cool. been back at Cold Rock.. enjoying work.. though there's lots of changes going on there now... it reminds me of how humans naturally resist change..and it takes a lot of effort to adapt and get used to "new" procedures..
changes.. hmm.. soon i guess there'll be even more changes if a new job comes along.. gawd.. i really rather be a student seriously. everythings' laid out..aint need to worry much about justifying your choices n decisions...=(

metta...

disgusted.

guess what. met a flasher today. young guy. prob bout 20 yrs old. wearing army singlet somemore. sick. in case u dunno, it's not the first time. damn suay lo.
if karma works, i dunno what the hell i did wrong.

anyway. all these stuff makes me really sick. do men really become brainless when they r turned on? i dun understand how they can always attempt to justify certain ridiculous acts with their "hormones" or whatever they wanna call it. it's plain stupidity.

anyway about today. as of the last few times, i reported to da police..din wan such a SOB to get off free. nor to prey on more innocent girls. n it so happened tat the police post was just 200m away... (which smart ass would do such a thing near a NPP?)
then..was asked to wait for police on patrol. .. during tat time..saw tat guy loitering ard still... n other gross details..
anyhow...police came...detained him.. sent him to "hell" i hope. had to take statement... but quite cool cos lotsa officers came to the NPP during da statement taking. like some big thing. haa =)
ive decided. the next time i come across another one (damn hope I won't though.), i shall prob laugh it out. maybe say smtg like "That's it?" )
told my parents.. maybe shd buy toto. sure strike.

SAFTI

went to SAFTI MI today..see my dearest bro lo. OC gonna-be wo.. tomorrow posting to Air Force..hm..it's funny hey, since both my parents were sign-ons of Air Force too.. heh. Im the odd one out then! =)

but seriously....turn back time a little..i mite sign on too. wanted to, just din haf enough motivation to ..

anywayz.. had to wake up @ 6am...amazing for me.. haa.picked Grace (bro's darling..) up..went for breakfast...n then to the MI. honestly...I was..n still am pretty impressed by the place. heh. I mean it's really quite nicely designed.. n the facilities etc. though I know the whole crazy thing there's the training..but still.. it's a life-time experience aint it? makes u a stronger man...(or at least it's supposed to.)

went up the tower..really nice hey. the view... din get to take much photos cos camera batt died.

recce the plc.. interesting.. =) can see the "nostalgia" my parents were experiencing too. if only I knew how it feels.. =)

after tat went for muay thai.. damn shitified. 1 month of inactivity n being out of exercise can really make a hell lot of difference! can't even jog much without gasping for air n wanting to give up. fitness level s totally pathetic now. sigh sigh. just 1 month.. i can imagine those atheletes having to be out of exercise cos of injury..some for months n even a year or so. sheesh. having to get the fitness n stamina back. wth...

haf some insurance stuff to go for next week. damn sian. i really can't wait to get over it. if i fail, then that's it. over n done with. if pass, im still not interested in it really. how do i explain it.. im really not into it and i feel very stressed up having to work smtg that i don't enjoy. it's a totally different feeling from what i get working in fnb or tours.. gawd. this is tough. life s not easy in singapore. for sure.

metta..

aww.

khit teng..

spent the last few days catching up with mum n dad over dinner, unpacking stuff, missing thailand etc. i dun understand how time can pass so fast..it's already friday?? damn.

anywayz, before i forget.. some photos u'll see here of the children with food.. they were making egg sandwiches last sat. yea. so cute.. even the 2-3yrs old were peeling the hardboiled eggs, mashing it, stirring.. awww.

let's see.. oh yea.. my last 2 days were kind of a havoc. my flight was on monday 11pm supposingly.. n my kind Canadian friends wanted to bring my to phuket town for a night before i return, to shop around.. so we left on sunday, after the annoying guests "played them out".
was a 4plus hour bus ride... we reached phuket town @ bout 6ish evening.

checked into the hotel..... this is the part. the moment i entered the room....OHHHH MYYY GAAAWWDD... well, it wasn like a 5 star hotel thing of course..it was like bout 30bucks Sing per nite..think bcos i was expecting just basic hotel facilities like those budget 2-3 star guest inns i usually stay in...
besides... after a month of a warm dusty room... with a handful of spider webs around.... THAT room was like LUXURY. damn these luxury things.. they shdn even exist.. makes ppl yearn for more.

n the fact that this was THE FIRST time i had a hotel room to myself! wooohooo! =) damn shiok can.
anyway.... we headed out for dinner.. window shopped a little..planning to shop the next day.
u haf no idea how amused i was with the room. just me n the room. the KING sized bed. well, yea, i watched TV...movies in thai with eng subt... the entire nite.. with the company of lots of chips.

guess wat. cdn sleep thruout the nite.. started to feel feverish.. had migraines.. by the time i hit morning. i was half a piece. cdn even walk straight. ended up stayin in bed while my friends went shopping. how shitified...
oh well. luckily i got a little better in the afternoon. did a little shopping @ Tesco..din buy much though.

then...drama in the evening.
planned to take the public airport bus frm the phuket terminal. when i reached.. was told by a taxi driver tat the last bus left @ 630pm. i was like wth? i was only 10 mins late. sheesh. he insisted taxi was the only means.. which meant his taxi.
ended up having to fork out 450baht (bout 20 Sing) for tat ride. sigh. but he was a nice guy. we ended up chatting.. in thai n eng =) i miss speaking thai.

as if tat wasn enough.. when i was juz about to get tru the customs.. the guy handling my passport declared tat i had overstayed. n i had to pay a fine of 500baht. again. i was really like wtf?
apparently, the "visa" was only valid till 30th sept. but my flight was 1st oct. so.. 500 baht PER DAY. sheesh. thank god i only overstayed 1 day. i din even thought of it.
it's kinda fishy though, bcos all the fine had to be paid in baht, cash n no visa allowed. i wonder where all the HUGE AMOUNT of money go to, cos lotsa "farangs" kenna too.

anyhow.. had to find bank ..get cash n pay them. sianz. lucky flight back was smooth. more trouble i wd haf decided to stay in thailand forever. heh. i wish.

hmm.. my brains are still working in the thai mode.. words are coming out in thai rather than english or madarin for tat matter.
n for h. sake's .. i need to have a plan. everyone's asking me what 's my plan now. what i m going to do. what 's lying ahead. urgh. i hate myself here.
i can't help think,tat i know ppl back there are more concerned bout others in different areas.
shitified.

metta... miss them.

back but wanna go back.

back in Singapore.. .. .. *sigh*

just wondering what the dek-dek (children in thai) are doing now.. I miss everybody at the orhpanage... the friendly vendors in the markets..the boss of the mini mart.. the happening lady frm the coffeeshop... the owners of the harleys dav. that got me burnt... the ladies who did my first pedicure.. heh.

oh yea..the lady who does massages...at her house.. she's damn good ... n where else can u get a 2hr massage for 200baht? that's bout S$9! (the rate in Bangkok... 1hr- least 200baht...or cheapest prob 180 baht..n they suck..)

my last few days were actually kinda happening... so bear with me while I prob gonna blog bout them for another few more posts.. not to worry.. more pics of the beautiful kids coming up too!

sunday... my last day at Ban Tharn Nam Chai (the name of the orphange in case u are wondering..).. was filled with a hint of disappointment...after a huge wave of excitement..

this is why...

apparently... a group (supposingly bout 70) was gonna visit the place.. so the children n the staff spent the entire morning dressing some of the girls up for their traditional dance which was planned to be performed.

Makeshift tables were set up to display goodies to sell for fund-raising.. snacks and drinks were prepared to cater for the huge group...

it was treated as a huge thing.. even the children and people from the nearby village (ITV) came over.. well... because the time the group was coming wasnt confirmed..so they waited.. n waited... it started to rain.. (what's new..) ... then it was 2pm... n 3pm... they had the feeling it wasnt gonna happen. the guests aint coming. the girls washed up. changed from the costumes to clothes. (btw..the whole dressing up n make up took more than 2 hours.)

I was told this aint the first time..and prob not gonna be the last time. I was kinda annoyed, on behalf of them.. that the guests just didn turn up without notice. Honestly, I think most people I know here would be really pissed off, grumble n complain about it. and they prob will never forgive the guests.

But... everyone there was fine. though I could sense the disappointment and the hint of upset.. they didnt really display it. they moved on. I really admire them.. I wished more people could be like them.. not just forgiving others..but more like the kind and understanding attitude.

it prob lies in their culture. compassion.. that's smtg I respect.

till the next post bout my last 2 days in phuket town! =)

with metta.